The 19th Amendment’s Statute of Limitations
Posted in General on April 5th, 2012 by Eugene Finerman – Be the first to commentAddressing its gender gap among American women, the Republican Party now disputes women have a right to vote. “Yes, there was some sort of amendment in 1920” stated Justice Antonin Scalia, “and I suppose anyone who was alive back then would still be entitled to vote. But from a strict constructionist interpretation, that right does not apply to anyone born since then.”
Chief Justice John Roberts added even 92 year women “cannot just waltz into the voting booth. These prospective voters would need ten pieces of identification to verify their age. That would include their Wellesley yearbooks, notarized cotillion dance cards, medical records of hickeys from F. Scott Fitzgerald. A written note from their father would also be required.”
Election judges will also have the right to challenge the voter’s gender. “Medical probes probably won’t be necessary. A few cellphone photos of the appropriate areas should suffice.”