Your RDA of Irony

Open Mike Night at Club Eugene

I am not going to worry about this election. Diebold has already counted my ballot; and it seems that I have voted for McCain six times in Florida and Ohio.

Of course, I have yet to recover from the 2000 election…but neither has Western Civilization. That election did answer the profound philosophical question: in a race between an idiot and a fool, who’d win? We now know: the idiot will. The idiot might do something inadvertently right while the fool will do everything meticulously wrong. Bush spoke as if he were in fourth grade, and Gore spoke as if we were in fourth grade.

In this election, John McCain claims to represent the mainstream against the liberals. McCain isn’t mainstream, he is a swimming pool at a country club–the shallow end. But Sarah Palin is genuinely folksy…just like a septic tank.

Barack Obama should accept the mantle of liberal. After all, look who is on Mount Rushmore. By my count, that is three liberals–and even Washington was a revolutionary. Secular humanist liberals founded this republic. Without them, this country would be under the hereditary rule of upper-class twits….Well, until 2000 it wasn’t.

In fairness, I will acknowledge the Conservatives’ contribution to America: they lost the Civil War.

  1. Jan Enger says:

    ROFL, Eugene! Another classic (I especially love the Diebold line). Here’s hoping the Hawaiian can ride the wave through Nov. 4 and into the White House.

  2. The world has come to an end. The Chicago Tribune has endorsed Barack Obama.

    Yes, the same Chicago Tribune that still advocates neutrality in World War II.

    The same Chicago Tribune that has a John Birch Day at Wrigley Field. (Free bobbleheads of Joseph McCarthy to the first 500 ticketholders.)

    That Chicago Tribune has endorsed Barack Obama.

  3. karen finerman says:

    So do we have to renew the subscription to the Tribune now??

  4. Rick Marianetti says:

    Hey Eugene

    Long time, no read.

    You think the Tribune made an unexpected U-turn?

    How about Christopher Buckley’s leap from the McCain freight train to the oncoming Obama express — a stunt of Indiana Jones proportions:

  5. Welcome back, Rick.

    I was amazed by the Tribune’s conversion. The newspaper had become soooo sleazy in style that I assumed its editorial stance would be just as repulsive.

    As for Christopher Buckley, he reflects the true Conservative’s disgust in the growing Neanderthalism of the G.O.P. The Republican base is embarrassingly base.

  6. Mia Marian says:

    Not only Christopher Buckley but just recently
    Colin Powell….. It’s a sign of the times.

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