Posts Tagged ‘Hillary Clinton’

Clinton Wins Luxembourg Primary

Posted in General on June 2nd, 2008 by Eugene Finerman – Be the first to comment

Insisting that the visitors’ book at the American Military Cemetery was a Democratic ballot, Senator Hillary Clinton today thanked the voters of Luxembourg for her victory in the primary. Reporters did find her name pasted in the visitors’ book. No other candidate’s name was found.

When the Obama campaign questioned the validity of a Luxembourg primary, Senator Clinton replied that cemetery was American territory and that its 5076 residents were entitled to vote despite their current physical handicaps. As the winner of this primary, Senator Clinton feels entitled to three supernatural delegates.

The Obama campaign is also disputing Sen. Clinton’s claim of a unanimous vote. The most famous resident of Luxembourg’s U.S. Military Cemetery is General George Patton who certainly seemed to be a Republican. Senator Clinton insisted that Patton would have preferred her to Senator Obama. “Patton knows that I would have slapped him back.”