Your RDA of Irony


Judy Lewis, Secret Daughter of Hollywood, Dies at 76

New York Times

Her mother was Loretta Young. Her father was Clark Gable.

Yet Judy Lewis spent her first 19 months in hideaways and orphanages, and the rest of her early life untangling a web of lies spun by a young mother hungry for stardom but unwilling to end her unwed pregnancy.

Loretta Young’s deception was contrived to protect her budding movie career and the box-office power of the matinee idol Gable, who was married to someone else when they conceived their child in snowed-in Washington State. They were on location, shooting the 1935 film “The Call of the Wild,” fictional lovers in front of the camera and actual lovers outside its range.

Desperate for any attention, Mitt Romney announced today that he was the illegitimate son of Loretta Young and Tyrone Powers.  “Yes, these star-crossed stars met on the set of ‘Brigham Young: Frontiersman.'”  When reporters noted that Miss Young was not in that 1940 film, Romney first insisted that he had said “Linda Darnell” and then explained Miss Young was not in the film, she just liked hanging around sets.  Mr. Romney initially did not seem to realize that he was claiming to be 71, but later expressed his pride in winning the World War.

Not to be outdone, Newt Gingrich announced that he was “the physical and spiritual heir of Bette Davis and Winston Churchill.  And it is with that proud heritage, I accept the mantle and sceptre of Western Civilization.”

And Herman Cain denied any relationship with Hattie McDaniel and Butterfly McQueen–at least in the same night.


p.s.  And let’s not forget the original Napoleon complex:


  1. Dennis Pennington says:

    I remember watching Loretta Young Theater when I was a kid . I always thought she was so pretty .

    • Eugene Finerman says:

      Apparently, so did Mr. Gable.

      I remember that show, too, and how she would come swirling through the doors, modeling some gown. Her entrances were always better than the dramas.


  2. Eugene Finerman says:

    And, in keeping with today’s theme, I am claiming to be the love child of Dorothy Parker and Meyer Lansky.


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