Your RDA of Irony

RSVPeeve

Lauren Bush marries David Lauren

CBS

The 27-year-old bride, who will go by the name Lauren Bush-Lauren, wore an “intricately embroidered Victorian-style gown” designed by her father-in-law Ralph Lauren.   The groom, 39, wore a “vintage Lincoln era-inspired tuxedo.”

Her parents, Sharon and Neil, who divorced in 2003, walked her down the aisle for the Jewish ceremony.

Guests at the ranch included the bride’s aunt and uncle, former President George W. Bush and first lady Laura Bush, cousins Jenna and Barbara Bush and uncle Jeb Bush, the former governor of Florida.  Her grandparents, former President George H.W. Bush and first lady Barbara Bush, were unable to attend but reportedly sent a video message that was played during Saturday night’s rehearsal dinner.

Could this be the video?

Gramps:  Sorry kids….

Barbara Pierce Bush:  Really Lauren!   Your father is a lecher and an embezzler, your uncle destroyed the country but at least they never married a Lifshitz.

Gramps:  They call themselves Lauren now.

Barbara Pierce Bush:  A leopard can’t change its spots–but the Katz can change their name.

Gramps:  Now, now, they are just trying to be Americans.

Barbara Pierce Bush:  Katz, Lifshitz.  It is all the same–not our type.  Really George, I don’t know why you even let that Greenspan fellow into the White House.  I am sure that he was stealing the silverware.  And now they have taken our granddaughter.

Gramps:  I imagine that Lauren was willing….

Barbara Pierce Bush:   Haven’t you read “Oliver Twist”?  Remember Shylock?

Gramps:  “Merchant of Venice” dear…and I read them both.  I was a Phi Beta Kappa at Yale.

Barbara Pierce Bush:  That would only impress a Jew.  Lauren, our wedding gift will be these annulment papers.

Gramps:  Our lawyer, Mr. Ginsberg, thought that it was rather amusing.

Barbara Pierce Bush:  I can imagine what he charged us….

Gramps:  Nothing!  Said that he was doing the Lifshitz a favor.

 

 

 

  1. Steve Katz says:

    Lauren, Katz, Polo, Chaps. All rags. So Clinton marries a guy wearing a talit that fit him when he was 7 years old. Did Lifshitz wear a talit? Anyone ever seen any Jewish wedding with the groom wearing a talit? That’s another story. What’s with these Jews marrying politicos these days? What’s wrong with daughters of scrap dealers? Are there no standards anymore?

    • Eugene Finerman says:

      Steve,

      I like the idea of designer talits. The Polo ads could display the models posing as Wild West peddlers.

      Eugene

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