Your RDA of Irony


`Cathy’ comic strip ending after 34 years

KANSAS CITY, Mo. – The comic strip “Cathy,” which has chronicled the life, frustrations and swimsuit season meltdowns of its namesake for more than 30 years, is coming to an end.

How should “Cathy” end? 

The Rapture would be useful.  Wouldn’t we all like to see Cathy earn her long-sought reward:  an eternal size two. 

Of course, the strip could resort to brutal realism.  The United Press Syndicate fires all the characters and replaces them with cheap Asian replicants.  The new strip would be called “Cathay.”

Many of us would settle for a little justice.  No one would mind if Cathy murdered her annoying, whining, Oedipal nebbish of a husband Irving.  (She’d get fan mail from Mel Gibson.)  Imagine Irving’s dying scene;  riddled with bullets, he is worried about staining the furniture.  And as the strip ends, we see Cathy arrested by Dick Tracy–and we’ll surmise that they will have an affair. 

However, the perfect ending would be Cathy running off with Dilbert.  (Yes, Dilbert would rather have Brenda Starr or even Blondie, but he has to be realistic.  An overweight stick figure is about the best he can do.)  As for Cathy, at least she will find herself in a relevant comic strip for the first time in ten years.

p.s.  Let’s not forget the historic significance of this day:

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