Your RDA of Irony

The Aristocracy Succumbs to Morals

Monaco’s Prince Albert to marry Charlene Wittstock

By  AP
news-general-20100623-EU.Monaco.Albert's.Engagement (The 52 year-old prince is the one on the left.)

PARIS — Prince Albert of Monaco is engaged to marry Charlene Wittstock, a former Olympic swimmer for South Africa, a union that will give this wealthy Mediterranean principality its first crown princess since American Grace Kelly died in 1982.
Succumbing to the bourgeois convention that some of one’s children should be legitimate, Bert Grimaldi will evidently try to protect the dynasty and his principality from the playboy sons of his idiotic (but good-looking) sisters.  
(The Renaissance art collection of Monaco–including Titians and El Grecos–was destroyed today when Count “Bobo” Grimaldi accidently ran over them with his Lamborghini.  The collection was in the Monaco National Museum, on the second floor.)
The insistence on legitimate heirs is a relatively new habit among the Grimaldis.  Louis II, the grandfather of Prince Rainier, never bothered to marry his mistress Marie.  She was only a cabaret singer, and perhaps her husband would have objected to the bigamy.  However, Prince Louis did recognize his daughter Charlotte as his heir.  With Monaco and a prince’s title as a dowry, Rainier’s father–the Count de Polignac–could overcome his pedigree prejudices.  He married Charlotte in March, 1920 and had a child by December of that year. 
That child was–and is–Princess Antoinette.  Her brother Rainier arrived in 1923.   Antoinette may well be the role model for her nieces Caroline and Stephanie.  She has four children, but only bothered to marry in time for the fourth. 
I wonder if the Dutch Calvinist family of Charlene Wittstock is going to be really thrilled with the Grimaldis.
p.s.  Let’s not forget the historic significance of this day:   
  1. SwanShadow says:

    Prince Albert? Is he still in the can? Better let him out for the wedding!

    Thank you! I’m here all week! (And yes, I’m still 10 years old on the inside.)

    • Eugene Finerman says:


      You are not the first here to refer to Prince Albert in a can. I did, in 2006, in my musings on the election.

      Here is one tabulation from the use of touch-screen voting machines. The entire neighborhood now has Mrs. Weinstein’s cough.

      An election judge (Republican, of course) challenged me on the correct spelling of my name. “Shouldn’t it be ‘Finnerman’–with two N’s?” Perhaps “Finerman” was our attempt at anglicizing.

      But enough of my suburban shtetl. Here is your RDA of Irony….

      Early Wednesday morning President Bush telephoned Nancy Pelosi. Attorney General Alberto Gonzales taped the following conversation.

      President Bush: Guess who!

      Nancy Pelosi: Mr. President.

      Him: Which one?

      Her: Bill Clinton would have asked me what lingerie I was wearing. Oh, and your father already called to congratulate me. He thought that you wouldn’t bother.

      Him: No, Laura made me. Congratulate for what?

      Her: The Democrats won the election. I am the new Speaker of the House.

      Him: KARL!!!

      Karl: She is lying, sir.

      Him: Oh, that’s a good one, Pell-pell. My turn: Is your refrigerator running?

      Her: Better than your campaign. And I don’t have “Prince Albert in a Can.”

      Him: Ya know, Queen Elizabeth got upset when I asked her that one. Seems he was a relative.

      Her: Do you have anything else to say?

      Him: Isn’t it funny when the French say “wee-wee”? They think it means “yes.” Oh, wait. The Vice President wants to talk to you.

      Cheney: I know where your grandchildren live.

      Him: They tell me that’s all I have to say. Bye.

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