Your RDA of Irony

Monday Medley

New Airport Security Measures

For flights lasting longer than two hours passengers will be subjected to a drug-induced coma.    (In deference to their religious principles, Christian Scientists will be knocked unconscious.)  Upon arrival at their destination, the comatose passengers will be placed on the baggage carillon until they are ready to reclaim themselves.

For flights lasting less than two hours, why don’t you just take the damn Greyhound.

Luggage will no longer be permitted on  flights.  If you need anything, you probably can buy it wherever you arrive.  Of course, you will have to get rid of it before your return flight; but the TSA was thinking of opening pawnshops at airports.

Truth in Advertising

The following story is 99 percent true.  Only the names have been changed to protect the guilty (an investment firm) as well as one litigation-fearing writer (alias me). 


The litigation-fearing writer caved in.

  1. Nina says:

    great medley! I am still laughing…

    You know those Vikings were/are very savvy and shrewd businessmen … ; )

    Nina Johannessen (100% viking)

  2. Bob Kincaid says:

    I get “bequeath, hand over, surrender” for trado, tradere, tradidi, traditus.

    Is this a one-girl firm? Wouldn’t “Tradissima” HAVE to be? Unless it’s a firm comprised entirely of eunuchs? Wouldn’t the plural mixed gender noun form be “tradissimi?”

    Given the “surrender” meaning of the word, it sounds more like a Bail Bonding business, Eugene. Tua pecunia illis non donare!

    • Eugene Finerman says:

      Dear Bob,

      I did alter the firm’s name, although not intentionally castrate it.

      The “hand over” definition of tradere acquired the more benign meaning of tradition. Of course, given the short livespans of the Emperors, treason was a Roman tradition.

      I am intrigued how the Latin word for clothing–vest–deviated into investment. At least, I can see the evolution of vest to travesty. Travesty is a comic work in the garb of a serious one.


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