Your RDA of Irony

The Whipman Sampler


RIYADH, Saudi Arabia (Reuters) The Committee for the Promotion of Virtue and Prevention of Vice, Saudi Arabia’s powerful religious vigilantes, have banned shops from selling any red flowers in the run-up to February 14.

Florists say the move is part of an annual campaign by the committee — whose members are known as “mutawwaeen” or volunteers — to prevent Saudis marking a festival they believe flouts their austere doctrine of “Wahhabi” Islam.

“They pass by two or three times a day to check we don’t have any red flowers,” said a Pakistani florist in Riyadh’s smart Sulaimaniya district. “Look, no red. I’ve taken them all out,” he said pointing to a dazzling floral collection covering every color of the rainbow except one.

These are the same “allies” who banned Barbie Dolls for looking Jewish. (Only the special Ralph Lauren edition did.) Can you imagine what would be acceptable in a Saudi Hallmark store? A Teddy Bear dressed as a suicide bomber? A Peanuts card showing Charlie Brown married to Lucy, Violet and Peppermint Patty; of course, you can’t tell any of the wives apart because of their burkahs and veils. And for those of you with a sweet tooth–and the Saudi mouth may only have that single tooth–a box of chocolates shaped like severed heads. Or you could have the chocolate-covered severed heads.

  1. Bob Kincaid says:

    Perhaps if the chocolatiers offered a red-tinted heart in its natural, human shape, that would appease these sick, twisted, barbaric thugs.

    I’m so happy they’re our pallies! I could just jihad for joy!

  2. Peggles says:

    I know it’s a cliche, but with “friends” like these, who needs enemies?

    If the Neo-Cons had their way, this country would have its own virtue/vice committee, all dictated by their “values.”

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