Your RDA of Irony

Thy Willard Be Done

This is a genuine press release. (Thank you, Fran):

Governor Mitt Romney in East Grand Rapids Tomorrow

Former Governor Mitt Romney will be in East Grand Rapids tomorrow for a tour of Gas Light Village. The event will begin at Olga’s Restaurant located at 2213 Wealthy St. at 2:45 p.m. To RSVP, contact the Romney for President Michigan Office at 248-254-6530.

Wealthy Street? Willard Romney has finally found his constituency! And Gas Light Village is just perfect for him:

Gaslight Village, near Reeds Lake in East Grand Rapids, includes luxury condominiums totaling 107 residences and offers refined attention to detail

And those details would be…a broad diversity of people, reflecting all the shires of England. (Of course, those Yorkshire types could be a bit gauche.) But they are bound by the same heartfelt principle: America should be run like a country club, especially with the same membership restrictions.

Yes, this is Willard’s constituency. Unfortunately, they are not the only ones allowed to vote.

If Michigan disappoints Willard, he will have no choice but to outsource the American electorate to China. Really, for the same amount of money that he has spent on ungrateful Americans, Willard could get ten times as many votes from the Chinese. True, the Chinese may not understand a word of what he is saying, but that is a distinct advantage. That way they won’t mistake him for Eddie Haskell.

  1. Rothgar says:

    I thought this was who all the Repubs were courting.

  2. Mitt can rely on that Republican political machine: Golfers for Eisenhower.

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