Posts Tagged ‘Precious’

No Sense of Entitlement

Posted in General on December 3rd, 2009 by Eugene Finerman – Be the first to comment

You may be aware of the film “Precious: Based on the Novel Push by Sapphire“.  Of course, that is only the shortened version.  Here is the full title:

“Precious: Based on the Novel Push by Sapphire, but we changed the name because Push sounds like a documentary on Lamaze or a biography of Alexander Pushkin–who although of Ethiopian descendant and died of a gunshot wound is not your typical rap artist, and besides we were afraid that one of our two producers–Tyler Perry or Oprah Winfrey–would insist on playing Catherine the Great–and of course, Oprah would get the role because she could beat Tyler to a pulp; so we decided to call the film “Precious” although now people will think that it is about Gollum’s obsession with “‘The Ring” and that mistake should be worth a few hundred million dollars in tickets, so we won’t mind; and if the Tolkien estate wants to make an issue of it, Oprah’s lawyers–all Harvard and Jewish, although none of their second or third wives are–would make Tolkien wish that he had never survive the Sommes; and Sapphire’s real name is Ramona Lofton but it was too long for the marquee.”

p.s.  If Oprah decides to make a film about Pushkin, the title could be “Boyar in the Hood