Despise and Consent, Part II
Posted in General on June 1st, 2009 by Eugene Finerman – 5 CommentsAnd here is the Senate Judiciary Committee hearing on Sonia Sotomayor’s nomination to the Supreme Court.
Senator Patrick Leahy (D.): Welcome Judge Sotomayor. Please reassure Senator Coburn that you will answer our questions in English.
Judge Sotomayor: Certainly. And I might as well take this opportunity to apologize for George Chakiris killing Russ Tamblyn in “West Side Story”.
Senator Jeff Sessions (R.): In the event of another war between America and Spain, which side would you be on?
Judge Sotomayor: You should take in consideration the four centuries of Spanish tyranny compared to one century of American neglect. I naturally would prefer the country that treats me like a second class citizen instead of a fourth class one.
Senator Arlen Specter (who knows?): Speaking for Senators Kohl, Feingold, Schumer, Wyden, Cardin, myself and half of Senator Kaufman, why can’t Benjamin Cardozo be considered Hispanic?
Judge Sotomayor: Maybe if his bris had been done with a switchblade. All right, here is my first ruling as a Supreme Court Justice: Benjamin Cardozo can be considered Hispanic but not Latino.
Senator Jon Kyl (R.): I understand that you were a member of Phi Beta Kappa. Tell us about this secret organization and its links with international terrorism.
Judge Sotomayor: It is an honor society, and its members tend to limit their terrorism to withering critiques of plays and restaurants.
Senator Chuck Schumer(D.): Would Benjamin Cardozo be considered Latino if his family had come from Argentina?
Judge Sotomayor: Let’s compromise. If you drop these farcockteh Cardozo questions, I will admit that Freddie Prinze was half-Jewish.
Senator Rush Limbaugh(R./God): How many times have you had an abortion?
Senator Leahy: You are not a Senator and you don’t belong here.
Limbaugh: Grassley gave me his seat. I have twenty million listeners. That makes me the fourth largest state, and if that doesn’t entitle me to at least one senate seat, it is Un-American.
Sotomayor: This would make an interesting case for the Supreme Court.
Limbaugh: And I’ll give you 5 to 4 odds I’d win.
And here is a reminder of the Alito hearings:
https://finermanworks.com/your_rda_of_irony/2008/08/23/despise-and-consent/