King of Kings
In celebration of Larry King’s 800th anniversary in show business, CNN will attempt to compile an hour’s worth of coherent sentences.
For example, who can forget his insightful questions when he moderated the Lincoln-Douglas debates. Apparently, neither candidate could satisfactorily explain “Why does pastrami cost more than corned beef?”
Yet, my all-time favorite was Larry’s interview with Donald Rumsfeld.
Larry King: You know that Rumsfeld sounds Jewish.
Rumsfeld: Please, I’m from Kenilworth.
Larry: Well, you know that Madeleine Albright didn’t realize that she was Jewish.
Rumsfeld: How did she avoid looking in mirrors? Couldn’t we talk about the Middle East?
Larry: Sure. Did you ever see “King Richard and the Crusaders“? Why doesn’t Hollywood nowadays have actresses like Virginia Mayo?
Rumsfeld: Well, she was a Republican….
Larry: You know, Mayo sounds Italian but it’s Irish. On the other hand, Robert Stack really was Italian but he didn’t look it.
Rumsfeld: About the Middle East…
Larry: Did you ever see “Omar Khayyam“?
Rumsfeld: Yes, and this administration is fighting Michael Rennie’s terrorist organization to ensure that Raymond Massey, Cornel Wilde and Debra Paget can live in a free and democratic Iraq.
Larry: Cornel Wilde was Jewish, too.